why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize