Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I queefed so loud it echoed.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
