Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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