stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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