there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize