Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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