Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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