he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize