On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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