I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
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