The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
