When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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