Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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