it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
