found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
