she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
are you so shy because you have an std?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
