He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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