I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
