Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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