Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
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