He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
