No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
