Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
