i think my tv is drunk
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
