Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
