Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
