I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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