well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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