I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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