I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
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