I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
