The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Found your dick twin last night
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
