Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize