And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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