Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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