my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
