Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
