Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
