The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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