Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
