Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize