Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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