When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
