What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize