I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
