Fine. I'll sleep in my office
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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