I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
