yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
