we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize