woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
