Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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