Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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