So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
