Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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